Half full or Half Empty?

M.

Two weeks has passed.

It was not so composed. I believe this is not something that I have expected earlier.

Maybe just not my thing. I have tried to jump in this environment last time. And I found out that it was not my interest at all. I did not know what makes me made this decision this time.

Of course I have my own reason. Its just does not seem parallel now.

Maybe, this is so not my thing.

Syafiqa, give yourself a chance. Give yourself some times.

Gimme some times. Let see how it goes.

May Allah show me His guidance.

Thanks you Allah for your never ending loves.

I am sorry that sometimes I forgot that I have you.

My shame.

Tomorrow

I believe, everyday is a brand new day. We should not let the fear of yesterday becomes the shadow of today. As one once told me, "Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game".

Tomorrow will be another chapter in my Life. This is my turning point for this year's mission and vision. I still remember the promised that I have made to myself. "Anjakan Paradigma for 2014 is highly required". Now the time has come. I am finally on the ground, awaiting for tomorrow's first day as I will start hiking the new mountain. Another mountain which has never guaranteed me that it would be better, smoother or even easier than previous mountain.

As Syafiqa is somebody who loves challenges really can't wait what tomorrow could bring for her. (In fact, I am very nervous now as I really have no idea what to expect.)

Gambate Syafiqa !

p/s: Japan.US.Local.German.Local...what's next? 0.o

Goodnyte. xoxo. Syafiqa.

Preparation

Since I have started my off day earlier. So, I do have 1 month free for the preparation to focus on. There's nothing much since Chiqie will be handling most of it. However, there are still a lot of things to figure out. Will occupy my off time as much as I could for the preparation. Headache. Real headache. Anyway, I should enjoy this moment.

May Allah ease my way.

Next Phase is Coming Soon

So, my last post was since Ramadhan?

Well, lets skip the Hari Raya's stories.....because there were a lot ! And I dont want to recite any of those stories. Malas ! Kalau dah malas memang tiada ubatnya....okay. Fine, malas bersebab dimaafkan.

What I wanna tell here that my bff has married during the 4th day of Syawal...will update the photos once I get those from her.

Anyway, lets talk about current stuffs. I will be making a move in the couple of months. Well, hopefully this is the right decision that I have made. It is not an easy one. Hence, it was not easy to win this opportunity. May Allah bless one of the big steps in my life. Looking forward to the upcoming new challenges.

Good Luck Syafiqa !

FT's Annual Dinner

This is FT's Annual Dinner which usually happens in the month of Ramadhan.


The food was awesome ! This dinner was at Homst TTDI.

Maaf

It has been 4th of Ramadhan. Alhamdulillah setakat ni belom tinggal terawikh. Will try to keep it up...Kalau boleh tak nak skip. Semoga sama-sama dapat penuhi. Anyways, hows everyone's doing? It has been nothing much being published here lately. I was not so much excited to publish anything these days. Well, I have a lot to tell...may be I just do not know how. Haha

Let's talk about Maaf. Aku percaya maaf itu sesuatu yang sangat mujarab in a relationship. Especially our relationship with God. I have been listening to IKIM these days. And there are so many inputs. Dan juga input daripada tazkirah dan rancangan tv.

My heart once really broke with an action of a friend. Really frustrated. I have forgiven her for so many times, but she kept on doing it. Until there's no more place in my heart that I can forgive her (even she never say sorry). My heart full of anger and hatred. I know this is salah satu "penyakit hati". So, untuk dijadikan cerita, I just cannot forgive her anymore. Thus, recently, I listened to the radio... "Macam mana Allah nak makbulkan doa kamu kalau Allah belom ampunkan dosa kamu. Macam mana Allah nak ampunkan dosa kamu kalau kamu tidak meminta ampun. Bertaubatlah." So, I was like...okay, kalau setiap kali doa lepas solat tu, memang minta ampun is the first thing that I will do.

Then, yesterday when I watched a drama series named "Ramadhan jangan pergi", the Usztaz says "Kita wajib memaafkan orang yang meminta maaf dan kita juga wajib memaafkan walaupon seseorang itu tidak meminta maaf". He continues, "Macam mana Allah nak maafkan kita sekiranya kita tidak memaafkan orang lain". MasyaAllah...terus tersentap! Yes, we are muslims. We are really a human. We are not nabi or rasul or whatever, tapi kita adalah khalifah Allah. Kita harus ikut amalan yang di ajar oleh nabi muhammad s.a.w. "Kita haruslah memaafkan orang dengan berlapang dada".

Ya Allah, memang aku tersentap. Aku tersedar, bagaimana Allah nak ampunkan aku sedangkan aku sendiri tidak mahu memaafkan org di sekeliling ku. Apa pon, ketika dan waktu ini aku tersedar, apa yang ustaz itu cakap itulah yang aku tengok pada umi & abah. Alhamdulillah....they have taught me well, tapi aku yang zalim.

Ya Allah, ampunkan aku hamba-Mu yang lemah ini.

p/s: Beribadatlah kerana Allah, tapi bukan kerana mahukan sesuatu.

Insyallah.

Enough is Enough

Dear Together,

Since small, I have been watching these non-stop drama. Even, my parents never mentioned about this. I am not stupid enough to not to know. I know, they bear a lot of things from these drama. And I could not bear seeing them being unhappy. What you guys trying to do? Acted so kind in front of us and at the same time throwing such a lot of ‘fitnah’ to my parents. Not only them, to “us” (my siblings) as well. What have they done to you guys? What have we done to you? I could not understand. Because, since we were small, we only keep growing, living our own life. But, these kind of people never stop doing this kind of thing. Acted so religious. But, they themselves throwing ‘fitnah’. Can’t we just let bygone be bygone? My parents never teach us to be rude with you guys. But, you guys keep pushing us to the limit. Belittle my parents, and said unnecessary things. Till when are we going to keep quiet and just let things happen? Until death do us apart? You have been so rude to my parents in front of me and my siblings. You have never respected them as how we were taught to respect you? So, until when you want us to keep quiet? We learnt all these things from you. Do not blame my parents. They taught us well. They never taught us to be rude with you guys. But, you never keep your attitude on the ground. What do you expect? When you guys do this kind of thing, they always keep quiet and be patient even things you said were untrue. They let things go because they appreciate you guys. But, until when???


I know, my parents will wreck me for writing this. But, I am not as patient as them.

Sorry for being unkind and insensitive. 

Weds Here and There

Here it comes, one of my favorite months of the year.

Well, I was a bit busy with the application. This and that.

Nothing much going on.

What I do know is I really need a new environment and new challenges in order to grow further in my career.

and, Alhamdulillah, we received one good news. It is for my family.

Besides, I have attended 3 weddings in a row.

Fatin & Izi - 30/1/2014
Sarah & Amir - 1/2/2014
Yan & Dania - 15/2/2014 

Glad to have the chance get back in group and had the time to chat with FT.

Anyway, additional picture below during Yan's bachelorette party at Kulcat's Bario.


A Week After

Too bad, exactly a week after the engagement day....he got into an accident. :,(






Be strong dear. Mungkin ada hikmah disebalik apa yang berlaku.

Well, back to Satria then. I love Satria anyway. :)

Put On The Ring

Dear Life,

I am engaged now.

Well, there's nothing much I could say. It is really a good beginning of the year.

We decided to get engaged.

It only took me 3 weeks to do the preparations and everything.

With the help from my family, especially my parents whom really put their hard work on this.

Well, they really happy to decorate our own bridal stage.

Not to forget my sisters and brother. Too bad, one of my younger sisters could not attend the ceremony as she has flown to Qatar a day before my engagement day.

Not all known were invited because for me this is only a small function. Really apologize for those who were not invited. It was meant to only family and relatives.

Enjoy the pictures.






Engagement Day

14/1/2014

2014 Resolution ?

Actually, I am about to write something today.

But, suddenly my eyes caught something.... ! 302views? Like seriously?

Well, its not harmful. But, I was surprised.

If I was harsh, I am sorry. I did not mean to hurt anybody.

Sometimes, if we keep something for too long. It will rotten inside.

Anyway, talking about this.

Welcome 2014 !

Thanks 2013. It was really great. Last Year, really taught me a lot of things. I really learnt my lesson. InsyaAllah, I will learn a lot more this year and try to be tougher and stronger. Knowing a person who is frank and honest is far better than knowing a person who just act to be nice but actually...zzzZZ

Well, I do not want to talk much about this because I remembered one thing...

"jangan ingat diri tu baik sangat hanya kerana Allah tidak membuka aib kita"

My point is, I am not saying she is bad and I am good. But, it's just that, selagi boleh simpan, cuba kita simpan. Sementara itu, ingat yang kita juga hamba Allah yang lemah.

But, what I learnt the most is, "jangan buat benda yang sama. That's all."

2014 Resolution?

I have nothing in mind right now. Because there are a lot of things I have to do right now. I was thinking about jumping up again. Well, let see how it goes. For me, whenever I want to improve something about myself, I don't have to wait till new year. Like last year, there were 2 main thing which I trained myself to change to.

1. Do not show that you have personal problems on your face whenever you are at the office. Well, I manage to win this. Compared to 2012, when I have some personal issue, most of my colleagues will ask me out, what happen to you? Why you look so sad or bad mood. Well, through out the year, I manage to change this. In fact, there was one saying, " I nampak you happy je, I know you are happy without me right?" Well, I was smiling, cheering myself up, but only Allah knows what's inside.

2. Everything looks good from outside. Such a ripe fruit. Such a perfect creation. But, when you keep it and thought it is the best, eventually it turn out to be rotten and wormy inside. Just remember, rambut sama hitam, hati lain-lain.

Well, when I have something related to resolution, will update again in here.

May this year bring more joy & happiness into my life !

May everything goes well !

May Allah bless each step that we take !